Great and Terrible Song Parodies
by LunaEquus
Summary: First I butchered Britney Spears. Now witness Kartik and Gemma rap along to Snoop Dogg. Hilarity most definitely ensues!
1. I'm Not a Boy, No More Rakshana

**Disclaimer: I don't own Libba Bray's writing, or Britney Spears's song. Imagine that.****  
**

**I'm Not a Boy, No More Rakshana  
**(Tune of Britney Spear's _I'm Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman")_

I used to think  
My fate was laid right out for me  
But now I know  
I betrayed them to save her neck, yeah  
Seems like they just want to kill me  
Now I am on the run

**Chorus**  
I'm not a boy,  
No more Rakshana.  
All I need is her,  
The one with bright green eyes,  
While I'm on the run.

I'm not a boy,  
I swear that I'm not a deckhand.  
It's time that I,  
Go run and hide with the gypsies.  
I'm not a trained dog to the English,  
I just like to drive carriages.

**Chorus**

I'm not a boy,  
Even without the Rakshana,  
You will see this in my eyes,  
I'm still a higher caste  
Then you.

I'm not a boy  
(I'm not a boy don't you call me a deckhand)  
No more Rakshana  
(Even though they really want to kill me, yeah)  
All I need is her (All I need)  
The girl with bright green eyes (Bright green eyes)  
While I'm on the run.

**Chorus**

I'm not a boy,  
No more Rakshana

**I know, I'm a total sicko for making Kartik sing to a Britney Spears tune, but I just had to.**

**Please review!**


	2. Wish it Like it's Hot

**After a thoughtful shower while listening to the radio, I somehow came up with the idea of Kartik and Gemma rapping. Of course, this song was also playing, and I was dancing. I don't own Snoop Dogg, or Pharrell. But I do own these particular lyrics. Enjoy the AGATB version of "Drop it Like it's Hot". I present "Wish it Like it's Hot". Yes, I know. Lame.  
**

**Chorus – Gemma**  
When us girl's in the realms, ma,  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot

When the sprites try to get at ya,  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot

And if Kartik gets an attitude,  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot

I got the necklace in my palm and I'm gonna summon  
The magic door of light cause I got it going on.

**Verse – Kartik**  
Uh! I'm a nice lad, with some nice dreams,  
See this cricket bat, see these gypsies?  
Rakshana novitiate, ancient brotherhood  
That's better than you ever understood  
I have a tent, exterior like canvas  
The interior, I know you wanna see it  
Listen little priestess, stop talking to spirits  
Close your mind 'ma, I know you can control it  
Brother with the bat, I know brothers from all over  
We will threaten you into submission by October  
So don't waste your breath pretending you don't know  
You don't quite need to know  
The Rakshana is in charge so even I don't know  
You should think about it, take a moment  
You know what? Take a few okay?  
And think before you mess with Rakshana K.

**Chorus – Gemma**  
When us girl's in the realms, ma,  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot

When the sprites try to get at ya,  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot

And if Kartik gets an attitude,  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot

I got the necklace in my palm and I'm gonna summon  
The magic door of light cause I got it going on.

**Verse – Gemma**  
I'm a priestess, but y'all knew that  
I'm the Most High, yeah I had to say that  
I keep the crescent eye under my bodice  
But only in the middle, because it's not little  
There's no other way to get around the pain that day  
I kicked so much you thought I was crazay  
_scratches_ "two!" - "one!" - "yep, three!"  
Last name is Doyle, first name starts with a G  
I can't stop it, so drop it, and when I take it  
I saw you gawking when my friends and I swam naked  
So tell your bros, all of you leave me be  
I don't care what you have to say, can't you see?  
So stop stalking me boy, you're just Rakshana's toy  
I got another world full of magic creatures  
Hiding from the preacher, the teacher, now the creature  
Caution to the wind, now ladies let's drink whiskey.

**Chorus – Gemma**  
When us girl's in the realms, ma,  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot

When the sprites try to get at ya,  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot

And if Kartik gets an attitude,  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot

I got the necklace in my palm and I'm gonna summon  
The magic door of light cause I got it going on.

**Verse – Kartik**  
I'm a hot boy, with a lotta woes  
But I can deal, I'm no little rose  
I hide out lots, but I'm no creep  
Rakshana, yeah we're the best  
I hide in the bushes and write you mean notes  
If you don't listen to me, you'll be dead  
Oh, so you think your kiss will change all that?  
You're going to the realms now, Gemma? Stop that!  
Killed a deer, now I think you're weird  
Your friend's crazy; pretty sure I'm screwed  
They betrayed you, but now they need you  
Must I remind I'm only here to protect you  
Terrorize you, kiss you, then save you  
Disobey the Rakshana because I believe you  
Come here Gemma, what's your issue?  
Baby come close, cause I think I might love you.

**Chorus – Gemma**  
When us girl's in the realms, ma,  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot  
Wish it like it's hot

When the sprites try to get at ya,  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot  
Sing it like it's hot

And if Kartik gets an attitude,  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot  
Bite him like he's hot

I got the necklace in my palm and I'm gonna summon  
The magic door of light cause I got it going on.

**I'll just keep this open for sporadic updates. Mainly, when the mood strikes me. Reviews?!! This was HARD to do!**

**Awake at 3 am,  
LunaEquus**


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